Oh, yes, it’s that month where heart-shaped-everything comes out and people start talking about love or lack there of. Love is not so black and white, though. It is found with friends, family, pets, and even in your hobbies. Everyone wants love yet most people limit their success in it by creating parameters and definitions; these are often distortions of what love actually is. Whether you’re looking for it or wanting to enhance what you have the key is to self-reflect, introduce new ways of thinking, and change up your routine.
By taking the time to self-reflect and ask yourself questions like “Who am I?” and “What do I need in life?” you get in touch with the internal side that propels your entire existence. What’s on your checklist of to-dos in life? Do any of those items speak to the person you really are or are they wants based on social expectations and materialism? Recognizing what motivates you could provide insight into how you let love into your life. You could be missing opportunities if you have an imbalance with your work, social, or private life. Whether you spend too much time at work, home, or with friends reflect on it and create a new set of things to do based on that reflection. Take a new class or call a friend you haven’t spoken to in a while. Visit a new coffee shop or a place that inspires you. By changing your routine and exploring new areas you become exposed to more people and increase your chances of finding love. You also shake off the daily grind which may be hindering growth in a relationship you already have.
Another form of self-reflection can be achieved by meditating. There are many types of meditation groups both free and fee based that will improve your mental clarity, love for others, and also introduce you to new people. In New York City there is a meditation space (Ziva Meditation) that’s recently become known as a place to network and has helped many people find ways to pursue a job that reflects who they truly are. This is something unique and beneficial not only to one’s career but happiness. Where there is happiness there is openness for other great things to come into your life. Meditation inspires and often creates transformation in your world both internally and externally. If you’re interested in a meditation center in Chicago, check out Meditate Yoga & Meditation Center in Lakeview; guided meditation classes start at $1.
When you’re ready and willing to meditate on love you can turn to “micro-meditations.” The technique is used by psychotherapist, Ken Page, to teach intimacy. He suggests that one of the best ways to bring love into your life is simply look at your contact list. Pick out the people who you trust and mean the most to you; who loves you for the person you are? Once you have that list you can explore “micro-meditations.” See below excerpt for instruction:
The following micro-meditation can be your foundation for more love. Pick any person who stood out for you as you reflected on your relationships. Now try the following:
• Think about what you love most about this person.
• Think about the quality of this person’s love for you.
• Remember one time that you deeply felt the bond between the two of you.
• Hold this person to your heart for a moment, and say “Thank you.”
And now, just let your feelings quietly ripple through you.
Practice this micro-meditation as many times as you wish, and just watch as your reservoir of love deepens and widens, day after day. The chances are great that it will, and that your life will become richer and more enjoyable, and you’ll start meeting new people who also love you for who you are.
See full article on intimacy and “micro-meditation” here.
No matter where you are in your life, with love or feeling like there is not enough of it, know that there is always a path that will lead to fulfillment. Let go of your ego and take the time to dig inside yourself. Find out what you need before you go out and try to get what you want. At the center of our being is a place that is quiet, all knowing, and full of love in it’s purest form. Once you know this place inside you, then, you will be on your way to having it on the outside.